I guess Tony Perkins is off the guest list


Berean Baptist Church Pastor Ron Baity receiving his “pro-family” award from Family Research Council President Tony Perkins.

I’m so irritated right now.

At the end of May, Tony Perkins, director of the right-wing hate group the Family Research Council, accepted a dinner invitation to the home of a lesbian couple, much to their surprise (no kidding).

According to Jennifer Chrisler, one of the women who sent the invitation,

(I am) a Christian and send (my) kids to Sunday school, and much like President Barack Obama, (I) point to the Golden Rule that Jesus taught as (I) hope to “soften” Perkins’ heart to same-sex couples.

Why do I feel like she is trying to justify who she is to Perkins? Perkins doesn’t like the fact that she’s a lesbian and he’s never going to change his views on the fact that having a mom and a dad present is the only way to raise a child, so I don’t understand the point in having an awkward, uncomfortable two-hour dinner conversation. It’s not going advance any sort of dialogue.

Don’t get me wrong, I am all about constructive conversation, but it’s not going to happen with certain people. It’s.Just.Not.

Yet that didn’t prevent certain news organizations from really really hoping it would.

After the dinner invitation announcement, they proceeded to cover this unfolding story like this was the beginning of the tide turning in favor of gay and lesbian equality in America. I guess the idea was that if you can get Tony Perkins to listen and see that we’re not all bad and that we’re just like him then we’ll all be okay and we can all get along. O, and gay marriage will happen too.

Yeah, well.

It turns out that four days prior to this “I’ll have dinner with a sinner” charade, the Family Research Council had given it’s highest “pro-family” award to Winston-Salem’s own Berean Baptist Church Pastor Ron Baity who has has called gays and lesbians worse than maggots and compared us with murderers. “Pro-family” my ass.

But hey, at least Focus on the Family, another super-conservative organization, feels like FRC went to far (Thanks to The Daily Beast for researching this today). Even Focus on the Family CEO Jim Daly said

The Bible is very clear [that] our conversations should be full of grace, gentleness and respect.  [T]hat doesn’t mean we back off of articulating God’s truth, but that we’re mindful to do so with Christ’s heart.

O wait, nevermind, I was confusing Daly’s being nice about telling me I’m wrong with actually caring about me.

Maybe the Focus on the Family spokesperson, Gary Schneeberger, can do better:

It’s heartbreaking to hear (Baity’s) rhetoric, because it doesn’t reflect the heart or character of Christ. Focus believes … it is possible to believe that God’s design for human sexuality is one man and one woman in the context of lifelong marriage. At the same time, we have to be able to articulate that based on another truth … God’s design is ‘love your neighbor as yourself.’ I don’t see a lot of love in those statements.

Well Gary, at least you tried. You failed, but at least you tried. But then again, that’s why you’re a paid talking head.


I know that equality will not be advanced if I sit quietly in my corner and wait for crumbs to fall from the table, I said as much the other day. But some people just aren’t worth my time, or your time, or anyone’s time. Some people are content to continually spew hate and anger and bullshit from the pulpit and hope that other folks continue to buy it. Some will and some won’t. None of them are my concern. Not anymore.

I am done dealing with folks who are not at least in the “movable middle.” I don’t have the time, energy or motivation to educate folks on the far right that the world will not end if LGBTQ folks get equality or (Pastor Worley) that even if you put all gays in one pen and all lesbians in another that there will still be gay babies born.

On that note, I’ll work with whomever wants to work with me, I’ll continue making plans for my wedding and I guess I’ll just drop Tony Perkins off the guest list. *Sigh*

3 responses »

  1. They’re really not worth stressing over. They believe what they believe and nothing will change that. The stress, unfortunately, comes when they try to force those beliefs onto society. They think they’re showing love for neighbor by trying to make someone what they’re not.

    • I agree. Usually they don’t filter into my world, I just think I’m especially sensitive right now after NC lost the Amendment One fight. And because all they’re doing right now, to your point, is “showing love” to me.

      Thanks for note!

  2. Pingback: “We are…not…alone « Poems, Prayers, Promises & Politics

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